Pastor’s Column
November 26 2025
Thanksgiving Day
by Lydia Maria Child
Over the river and through the wood,
To grandfather's house we go;
The horse knows the way
To carry the sleigh
Through the white and drifted snow.
Over the river and through the wood--
Oh, how the wind does blow!
It stings the toes
And bites the nose,
As over the ground we go.
Over the river and through the wood,
To have first-rate play.
My dear church family,
Are you reading this with thoughts of whether the turkey you took out of the freezer yesterday will actually be thawed by tomorrow morning, or whether your new recipe for balsamic brussels sprouts roasted with cranberries and pepita seeds will be scorned by your family who considers green beans with mushroom soup and French’s onions the only acceptable Thanksgiving Day vegetable?
These worries pale in the face of those who are praying for peace, not in the world, but around the Thanksgiving Day dinner table. So many families find that the large family gatherings bring with them old hurts, fresh reminders of unkind words or, perhaps even worse, empty chairs where a family member has refused to acknowledge an invitation to the dinner.
I am currently listening to an eBook called Crucial Conversations. This primarily addresses conversations in the workplace but can easily be applied to family interactions. A crucial conversation is one in which opinions vary, the stakes are high, and emotions run strong.
Does this apply to any conversations you may be dreading? Perhaps an in-law who still harbors anger over what they perceive as an unfair division of inheritance when an older aunt passed away, or a stepsister who will insist on wearing blue to the dinner when she knows you and your husband favor red, or a grandson who will come stumbling into the dinner an hour late having already enjoyed too much dinner wine?
These are all situations where emotions run strong, opinions vary as to what is acceptable behavior, or what is the best course of action, and the stakes are high, with the future health of the relationships depending on how the communication and interaction proceed.
I encourage you to think and pray today about what you may experience tomorrow. Ask God to soften your heart toward those who you may dread interacting with. Ask God to use you as the “balm of Gilead” helping to heal old hurts. Ask God to help you truly love the ones who you dread sharing dinner with. May you face conversations honestly and lovingly.
Lydia Maria Child was a poet and novelist born 200 years ago in my home state of Massachusetts. She is known for her pioneering work advocating for the rights of women and working tirelessly for the freedom of slaves during the Civil War. These were controversial topics on which opinions differed, emotions ran strong, and the stakes were high.
“Child worked hard to ensure that the conflict would result in true liberation for the Black people. Her writings from this time were carefully designed to calm fears on the emancipation question and to prepare her Northern readership gently for the former slaves; eventual acceptance as full-fledged members of a free republic.”[1] I love the picture that is painted here of Child. She uses all her skills, “hard work, care, gentleness” to ensure that her writing helped people on the crucial question of emancipation in a way that would “calm fears.” This is a goal that we can all strive for when engaged in crucial conversations, or indeed in social conversations around the dinner table.
Despite her efforts as an activist, perhaps the writing for which Child is most remembered is the poem which some of you may recite at your meal tomorrow. I share it now, with the prayer that you will take a moment to rest in the memory of happy times around a table where sharp comments were not understood by your childhood mind and the only painful experience was the walk through the stinging cold to the warm and inviting home of a beloved grandparent.
Hear the bells ring,
"Ting-a-ling-ding!"
Hurrah for Thanksgiving Day!
Over the river and through the wood,
And straight through the barn-yard gate.
We seem to go
Extremely slow--
It is so hard to wait!
Over the river and through the wood--
Now grandmother's cap I spy!
Hurrah for the fun!
Is the pudding done?
Hurrah for the pumpkin-pie!
The poet, Mary Oliver wrote, “My work is loving the world.” May our work tomorrow be loving those with whom we share the day. I am holding you in prayer for loving interactions. May you each know love and acceptance on this Thanksgiving Day and may others know God’s love through you.
Warm wishes,
Pastor Cindy
[1] https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poets/lydia-maria-child Accessed 11/26/25!